Managing highs and lows

We all go through highs and lows our life long. Highs and lows in terms of self-achievements, social interactions, emotions, wealth, love, etc..We all need to deal with the inherent volatility of highs and lows around and within us. Consciously or not, we adopt a certain modus operandi in dealing with these situations. Our choice of attitude in reacting to this volatility is disproportionately key to our happiness. In physics terms, highs and lows create an acceleration in our otherwise  cozy “life cruising” at constant speed. Our reaction to this acceleration will significantly affect our situation. A positive, optimistic reaction will put things in an easier perspective. A negative, pessimistic one will make things worse, sometimes in an endlessly destructive pattern.

I talk physics instead of psychology because the events affecting us with high and lows can best be treated in physics terms: energy boosts, sometimes positive, sometimes negative. Our reactions are equally matters of physics: an optimistic reaction creates a positive derivative/dynamics to bend the curve positively, A negative one bends the curve negatively. This evidence-based, cold-blooded non-emotional approach may allow us to detach ourselves from our own confusions and develop a non-emotional, clearer understanding of our inner workings in challenging times.

Needless to say that optimism is preferable to negativism, in terms of the self-comfort it generates. So the next question is : how to consistently develop a positive framework to boost the highs and lows in a better, more positive direction. I can only share three of my own “tricks”:

1. all is relative: we often amplify our fears and closer examination reveals that in most cases the worst case is quite tolerable. Yes, we will have less but it does not really matter, does not really change things at the core. Self-adjustments are so numerous and effective. as long as we don’t hang on to fixed, stale ideas.

2. all is relative: a negative turn sets us back in time to where we were sometime ago before we grew. Time will heal many things and give us an enhanced opportunity to recapture what we temporarily lost.

3. all is relative: the forced change implied by the high/low may in fact be quite positive in changing us in a better direction than we were. We should always examine changes as potentially positive opportunities to improve ourselves. Opportunities to identify where we are stuck and to “un-stuck” ourselves.